Just so tired of snow....

I was in dire need of something RED! I picked through some kits and found bits and pieces that I liked. I made the page tabs out of boredom one night. I still don't have the creating bug back. I like the tabs and all but they don't thrill me like my art once did.

It never matters much to an artist if there's any money made. Just expressed appreciation is enough to keep the work going.

I wish I still had it in me. I know it's there because I've made some stuff privately for myself and a few friends. But I still get no joy out of it.

Late at night, like it is now, was when I always had one of those *bang* ideas that would get me furiously working with all of my different digital tools. All of those *what ifs* going through my head until I had a whole set of somethings to share. Zipping the file at 3am when I should have been fast asleep. Excitedly putting together the post while waiting for the file to upload to box.net. And once I hit that *publish post* button the rush that my work was out there to be seen.

But no one ever said hello anymore. No one took the time to say one word anymore. I kept going, kept creating until one post from a woman, anonymous, in Gilbert, Arizona said that she didn't feel that she should say thank you. She felt that just her taking what she wanted should be thanks enough because that shows the appreciation. I guess in the same way that a shoplifter shows their appreciation to the store owner when the store gives away free coffee and donuts. And she comes in to take the whole box. Every day.

I wish I still had it in me, I miss creating and giving away. But it's gone. Stone dead. I really miss that rush I had when I hit that *publish post* button.


Credits: background paper by http://sweetblossomdesigns.blogspot.com/
heart by Designs by Angelica E
puppy by Mamrotka
newspaper branch,lock,key,ticket stub by www.malacima.blogspot.com
spiral journal by NBK Scraps
paper frames, page tabs by Majortiggerscraps